First Belle
‘Sir, would you like to advertise in the yellow pages’. I was new to the job and was happy to have somebody to talk to. She would call me every day and talk about ad size, release date, file format, discounts…then finally, ‘Sir, when can we meet?’ I was like, ‘How about tomorrow?’ The next day, I reached office fully fragrant, expectant…and this huge guy dark ambled over to my seat, ‘I am from yellow pages’.
What? Something was not right, I asked him, ‘Where is Sunitha?’
‘Sunitha?’ the gentle giant knitted his brows, was trying hard to think, then, click…a smile lit up his face, ‘Saar, she is from our call centre’.

Second Belle
‘Sir, would you like to advertise in the yellow pages’. Ah! You can’t fool me twice; I asked her, ‘Are you from the call centre?’
‘Yes’.
‘Then why should I talk to you?’
‘Because I am fun’
You can’t argue with that…Sonali was her name. Vadakkan, dad was a prof in Anna U. She was cramming for CAT and yellow pages was for pocket money. One day she told me, ‘Babu, you sound exactly like my old boyfriend’. I had to match that ‘You know what, my ex’s name is Sonali’. We started burning up the telephone wires; she was so good that after her call even the guy in the next cubicle would have a cigarette. Then one day, we met…she read the disappointment on my face, and never called me again.

Third Belle
‘Sir, would you like to advertise in the yellow pages’. Jyothi was a sardarni, but I did not want to take any chances…so after a few calls I asked her how she looked. She said she was engaged…pretty soon I officially launched my bride-hunt, and Jyothi became my new best friend. In fact, when Velan got married and I had to move out of the Kalakshethra flat, it was Jyothi who got me a PG acco with her friend’s family.
(Aunty and Smitha treated me like a member of the family and I lived with them for close to a year till my sis joined me in Chennai. I had had a great time with them, and when it was time to part, Aunty was in tears, and the stoic Smitha had Don’t Leave looping on her stereo.)

Last Belle
‘Sir, would you like to advertise in the yellow pages’. A couple of months ago. By then I had taken to snapping at all unsolicited calls, but this voice was electric. Act 1 and 2, same formula. Then one day, ‘You know, my husband works in the movies and he goes on these long tours’. I wouldn’t say I wasn’t tempted…I asked her, ‘What does your hubbie do?’ Seema said, ‘She’s a stuntman’. Halo Halo kelkan mela.

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Photo from Google Earth.

Check out the website. (The faculty page has some familiar names – Mr. Xavier Panackal, Mr. M. J. Zacharia, and Paulosechettan)

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Check out John Updike’s ‘I Missed His Book, But I Read His Name’

Though authors are a dreadful clan
To be avoided if you can,
I’d like to meet the Indian,
M. Anantanarayanan.

I picture him as short and tan.
We’d meet, perhaps, in Hindustan.
I’d say, with admirable elan ,
“Ah, Anantanarayanan —

I’ve heard of you. The Times once ran
A notice on your novel, an
Unusual tale of God and Man.”
And Anantanarayanan

Would seat me on a lush divan
And read his name — that sumptuous span
Of ‘a’s and ‘n’s more lovely than
“In Xanadu did Kubla Khan” —

Aloud to me all day. I plan
Henceforth to be an ardent fan
of Anantanarayanan —
M. Anantanarayanan.

Source. Thanks VP!

Got up very early, skimmed through the paper, the coffee-maker not showing any signs of waking up, so back to the paper. IIPM’s two-page ad in the Deccan Chronicle highlighting their Global Opportunity & Threat Analysis Program (GOTA), Global Student Exchange Program (GSEP) and Global Outreach Program (GOP). 40 Photographs of “international professors who taught and took exclusive sessions with IIPM students”. I was scanning the gallery for famous faces/names when “ZurPic” hit me. ZurPic? withoutaspace?

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Years of working with layout artists told me that ZurPic had to be a file name. (Google proved me right – check out Prof. Zur Shapira’s IIPM page). I was thrilled, this is blog fodder…IIPM vs Blogs all over again…”Blogger Exposes IIPM’s Shoddy Proof-reading Practices”.

Then I did a double-take, am I seeing double, Did I see two photographs of Samuel Craig of Stern School of Business…my eyes are tired, GOTA GOP GSEP some sleep. GBYE.

Last Friday, when I was on 6041 heading to Kochi, my hit counter crossed 6041 (OK, I was on 2623, and the count crossed 6041 only on Saturday – but then the first line is more dramatic). And to commemorate the occasion, I am releasing the list of my all time Top Ten. Ta Da…

Desperately Searching Meera Nandakumar
I am a Malayalee…

Hey! I got a reply from Vimala Raman!!

Top-Ten Terms

The World According to Garp

Chennai-Velankanni-Pondy

New Two Rupee Coin

Looking for ‘Bharathapuzha allenkil Nila

About

These Mallus…

 

The Top Ten Posts got 45% of the traffic. Meera single-handedly managed 12.6%.
(Image flicked from Flickr. Thanx Saffanna)

I started composing a post titled Bell’s Belles on my misadventures with call centre chicks, learnt that today is Bell’s birthday, Googled, stumbled upon Saul Bass who designed the iconic AT&T Bell System logo, also many famous movie posters, and title sequences for films such as It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, which incidentally inspired the opening sequence of Catch Me If You Can, the movie based on the misadventures of Frank Abagnale Jr. Where was I? Gotta stop this hyperlinked stream-of-consciousness stuff.

Last Diwali, en route to Cochin, BAR in the car (that’s Babu Annie Rohan). Somewhere near Mettur, we saw a panchayat board – POTTANERI. ‘Potta, looks like just the right place for you!’, I told my son. Boo haa haa. Next village – ERUMADU. Wow! this really is getting better, I asked my wife, ‘Maad, your hometown? And was that your cousin on the roadside’. I was feeling very heppy and high till I saw the next signboard – KUNJANDIYUR. Pondatti gave me a look, and I decided to concentrate on the road.

Check out a song from the new Malayalam movie Subhadram. Beautifully sung by Chitra, music: P Raghu Kumar, lyrics: Srilal Devaraj, the director.
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Song link

If you are a movie buff and a quizzer, chances are you are familiar with ‘Six Degrees of Bacon’. The game is very simple. You select a film star, and connect him to Kevin Bacon, in six links or less. The game’s name is a pun on the concept of Six Degress of Separation (“anyone on the planet can be connected to any other person on the planet through a chain of acquaintances that has no more than five intermediaries” source).

Game Demo:
Clint Eastwood was in Space Cowboys (2000) with Marcia Harden
Marcia Harden was in Rails & Ties (2007) with Kevin Bacon
(2 links)

Mammootty was in Kandukondain Kandukondain(2000) with Aishwarya Rai
Aishwarya Rai was in Singularity (2008) with Brendan Fraser
Brendan Fraser was in The Air I Breathe (2007) with Kevin Bacon
(3 links)

Clark Gable was in The Misfits (1961) with Eli Wallach
Eli Wallach was in Mystic River (2003) with Kevin Bacon
(2 links)

(Bacon is at the Centre of the Movie Universe. Not convinced? Check out University of Virginia’s Oracle of Bacon)

The game has helped me survive many seminars and training sessions over the years. And in the good old days before Google and imdb, the pleasure of finding a link, after racking the brain for hours, can only be described using a word that my firewall wouldn’t approve.

It was a colleague of Velan who introduced me to Six Degrees.

Let us call her Diya. When I called up Velan’s office one day, I happened to speak to her – she had this lovely voice, with a hint of mischief. She was a great conversationalist, and I had time to kill. Soon Diya became a daily habit, I was spending hours on the phone, and dying to meet her. Finally, D-day, her birthday. She said she would wait for me in front of Adyar Bakery. I rode my KB to the Bakery, I saw her standing there, took a U-turn and disappeared…well, almost. To cut a long story short, we became friends, very good friends.

Around that time, a girl working with Diya and her college sweet-heart decided to get married, against the wishes of both their families. Typical Hindi padam: Rich boy – poor girl, Vadakkan boy – TamBram girl, Anupam Kher – Amrish Puri. The boy was going abroad for his MS and wanted to tie the knot before he left. The kids were broke and their friends were scared to support them because of Amrish Puri. Diya decided to sponsor the wedding but asked me to front the operation.

After a week of hectic preparations…Inside Kapaleeshwar Temple. Almost muhurtham. Friends and colleagues hanging around. The lovely couple, he in a sherwani, she in kancheevaram, before getting on the stage, they dive for my feet, and I flee.

PS, posted a day later: I now realize that the last line was a subconscious tribute to one of my favourite books, Catch 22, which ends with “The knife came down, missing him by inches, and he took off“. Six Degrees of Separation again?

1987 – Right after Pattar’s victory at Ragam. On a Mullapanthal table he very proudly demonstrated the prize-winning bongos bit…and Rojobhai managed a near-perfect copy with one hand (the other hand, of course, was busy).

Another visit. Biju wanted ‘vedi irachi’ and was served ‘aama fry’, sparking off a session on the methodology of hunting tortises with guns.

Ormayundo?

(Thanks to Pattar for the images. Website)

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PS: No Frog Legs…

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